Fanaticologist Mike Garcia gives a running diary of yesterday's elite eight games. It's what you were thinking, only funnier and more articulate.
Since I’ve been unable to generate quality analysis of this highly entertaining and almost completely random NCAA Tournament (mostly due to the fact that I can’t get over how good Stephen Curry is), I somehow decided it would be a good idea to keep a running diary of all the Elite Eight games. The only way this can’t work is if Kansas throws one more alley-oop, in which case my head will explode. Let’s get to it…
Saturday, March 29: Xavier vs. UCLA
6:35 - Neither of these teams is dominating, which should mean we have a back-and-forth type of game ahead of us. I’m giddy, especially after sitting through eight regional semifinal blowouts.
6:37 - I guess it warrants mentioning that I really like this Xavier team. The Musketeers are like a poor man’s Kansas in the number of athletic swingmen and versatile defenders they have on their roster; they’re just smaller than the Jayhawks and throw fewer alleys.
6:41 - Bill Raftery just made his first inaudible and nonsensical comment of the day. Taking the under at 37.5 in my office pool was a mistake.
6:44 - Four baskets, three huge dunks, including two by Xavier’s Derrick Brown that registered on the Richter scale. This is gonna be awesome.
6:48 - Bud Light might want to discontinue its cross-promotion contract with Semi-Pro before that bomb hits DVD. Wait… what’s that about “only in theaters?”
6:52 - Kevin Love just overthrew Darren Collison on an over-the-head in-bounds pass, yet this draws nothing but praise from the announcing team (his incredible strength, not the poor decision). I don’t get it; for all the attention he gets, shouldn’t Love understand the concept of a chest pass?
6:57 - Two shot clock violations, two blocks, and something like 25 steals already… I don’t know if I’ve ever seen two college teams play harder or more aggressive defense.
7:10 - The last five possessions for Xavier: air ball, turnover, turnover, shot that hits the underside of the rim, two open misses. Raftery: “They’re executing, they’re just not hitting shots.”
7:11 - In case you haven’t noticed, Russell Westbrook is really, really, really good. He just pushed Josh Duncan, who has six inches and 50 pounds on Westbrook, from the foul line to the bottom of the pain on a box out.
7:19 - Ashton Kutcher has finally decided to crawl out from under his rock and grace us with a camera ad. Just what I needed!
7:23 - Looks like X just figured out that dunks help your field goal percentage. Who knew? Well, besides Tim McCarver.
7:26 - ALLEY-OOP to Derrick Brown out of a time out. Poor man’s Kansas, indeed. Brown gets to be the lamer version of Brandon Rush - that’s something like his fourth dunk already.
OK, I’m taking a dinner break… I’ll be back for the second half.
7:48 - Back. You head it from Raftery: X needs to be more relaxed and maybe “alittlebittougher.” I love the coach.
7:51 - Lavender needs to toss the ball about 12 feet in the air to keep Kevin Love from blocking it. He tries the same thing two minutes later and gets packed. Such is the life of a 5’7” point guard.
7:58 - Another great Russell Westbrook moment: he picks off a pass, goes coast-to-coast for the lay-in, plus the foul. He misses the foul shot, but Love does a great job getting the rebound, and he dishes to Collison for three. A nice five-point play for the Bruins, and I think it’s safe to say it’s not the underdog’s day.
8:03 - Duncan shoots his third or so rim-out of the day, and Love drains a three at the other end. That’s a 14-0 run and a 20-point lead for UCLA, and… game over.
8:09 - “You can feel it… this guy is one of the premier point guards in the country.” That from Raftery after Collison drains a step-back three with the shot clock at one. I’d have to agree with that assessment.
8:12 - Xavier’s trying to step up the defensive pressure. Let’s see if the Bruins can handle the pressure better than they did against Western Kentucky.
8:16 - Apparently, Bill Raftery is co-starring in an episode of CSI later this season. I’m so excited, my hands are shaking. Just for good measure: “I majored in chemistry. I used to mix drinks in my college days.”
8:21 - Love just tossed an 80-foot in-bounds pass to Westbrook for an easy two after a Xavier bucket. I hate to contribute to the slurp-fest, but this kid is just incredible. That goes for both of them.
8:29 - Kevin Love just hit another three. Remind me how DeAndre Jordan is ranked above him on every mock draft board again?
8:36 - UCLA fans rise to their feet, their team up 22, acknowledging what’s been a victory for about 12 minutes of game time already.
8:37 - Screw the iPhone, I want a curly-haired Swedish dude in a white turtleneck.
8:41 - I know they’re down 19 with three minutes to go, but check out the last four head coaches of Xavier: Sean Miller (current), Thad Motta, Pete Gillen, and the late Skip Prosser. Not bad at all. X might supplant Tulsa (Tubby Smith, Bill Self) as the mid-major cradle of college head coaches.
8:46 - It’s official - the 76-57 final score marks three straight Final Fours for UCLA, the first team to do it since 1999-2001 Michigan State. This also marks the 18th trip to the national semis for the Bruins. Damn.
Next Game: Louisville vs. North Carolina
9:05 - It just dawned on me that I have Louisville in this one. What was I thinking? Oh well, it gives me more of an excuse to openly root against Carolina.
9:08 - CBS just showed a stat - UNC trailed for a total of 1:23 in the first three rounds of this tournament. They’ve trailed for two minutes already this game.
9:10 - Tyler Hansbrough can’t buy a basket early on. Maybe that’s why he looks so disbelieving.
9:16 - Louisville has the most active hands on defense this side of UCLA. Too bad they can’t hang onto the ball.
9:18 - Ty Lawson just blew by, like, six Cardinals on the way to a lay-up (I know, I didn’t think it was possible, either).
9:20 - UNC has seven offensive rebounds under eight minutes into the game. Louisville has two total boards. It’s gonna be that kind of game - “Carolina… BIG” were Seth Davis’ exact words, I think.
9:25 - Does Roy Williams ever have to design set plays, or can he just say, “OK guys, let’s go get us some points!”? Sadly, it looks like every game from here on out is going to be at least a 15-point blowout.
9:32 - Dick Enberg just called the game for Carolina, which is up 10 with eight minutes left in the first half. A CNN exec just called him to ask if he could work the network’s Election Night 2008 coverage.
9:37 - Hansbrough hits a 17-foot jumper to put his team up 12. He’s too good; he needs to leave for the pros already. I’m serious.
9:39 - You’re kidding me - Terrence Williams just stopped a 3-on-1 fast break by himself with an incredible block. Keep an eye on that kid; he’s one of the most underrated athletes in the nation.
9:45 - UNC has gone three minutes without a field goal, but still leads by seven. It’s really a testament to how incapable Louisville has been on offense.
9:46 - Can any team push the ball up the court better or faster than the Tar Heels? Even after made baskets, they all sprint back down court and catch the defense completely off guard with perfect passes on the run.
9:50 - Louisville is shooting over 50% and trails by 12, thanks to a 7-0 spurt in just over a minute by the Heels. In retrospect, it was pretty foolish to think anyone would beat UNC. The Heels don’t even have to try for easy buckets.
It’s half-time, and I need a break from this slaughter
10:18 - This is one of those games where Louisville can’t quite get over the hump - they haven’t been within five points since the 10-minute mark in the first half. Every time they make a run at it, UNC comes right back with a couple quick buckets.
10:26 - Give credit to Louisville: after a triple, they cut the lead to six with 15 minutes. They’re not going away.
10:28 - If I hear one more thing from Jay Bilas about Tyler Hansbrough’s motor, hustle, or heart, I’m going to snap.
10:31 - Louisville is in the heat of a furious rally and has cut the lead to two with 12 minutes left. This is, of course, accompanied by a chorus of boos, thanks to UNC’s home court advantage.
10:33 - Dude.
10:35 - Who else? Tyler Hansbrough stems the Cardinals’ rally with a three-point play. I can’t wait for him to leave the ACC.
10:37 - This is unbelievable; Louisville has really come to life from three. It’s incredible how fast they rallied from a double-digit deficit. 59-59 with over 10 to go. And now all the Louisville fans in Charlotte are into it.
10:43 - That’s the second Louisville basket negated by a travel. For a great comeback, the Cardinals are really shooting themselves in the foot.
10:48 - And Carolina starts to pull away…
10:48 - Or not! An and-one on the backdoor cut for the Cards… Rick Pitino’s team just won’t go away.
10:50 - If only Louisville could make the easy buckets… Hansbrough’s two foul shots put UNC up four with under 7:00 remaining.
10:55 - Louisville’s hit panic mode, forcing up bad shots and ill-fated passes because they’re down seven. Call the game.
10:59 - Cardinals on the comeback trail again… but a bad pass derails the possession. This team is one veteran court presence away from a 10-point lead right now.
11:05 - Carolina’s hit their stride - an 11-3 run in the last 5:30 to seal a trip to San Antonio.
11:11 - The crowd goes nuts as the Heels officially lock it up. That’s it for me - enjoy the rest of the tournament.
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